11 October 2008


Well, I've started the new diet. Lets see how it goes. Started the day with a glass of water, which I think is important anyway. Then had my coffee and waited 10 minutes (which turned into 45) to have my shake. Now I need to wait at least 30 minutes before I can have a drink.

I've been half heartedly attempting the new eating style (space out liquids and food) but not too great at it, because nothing else in my diet changed. Now that I have officially started the pre-diet diet, I will be sticking to them more stringently.

I really think nobody has 100% faith that I can do this. They've seen me struggle with diets before, so I guess they assume this will be 'just another' of those. I'm not stressing about it though. I know how I feel about this and how determined I am to succeed. I will just plod along and let time teach them.

So many changes are happening with me. I now get up around 5am and I'm in bed by 9.30 each night (very not me). I'm taking my daily shower in the evening instead of early morning. I'm taking control of my eating. I've started a new job which is actually enjoyable for a change.

I've made a commitment to change and I'm never going back to who I was. I've been overweight for years. I've been emotionally out of control and unbalanced. I've seen myself do crazy things, have extreme highs and extreme lows. Its only over time, as I've gotten older and learnt to tell the signs of when an extreme was about to occur, that's I've been able to develop more of a somewhat 'normal' life experience. I think the anti-depressants have been an enormous help in me being able to work and have some kind of 'normal' life.

Changes I'm looking forward to:

Smaller dress size. First mini goal: size 18
New, sexier clothes
Getting my fitness back
New sexier body
Getting work done on my teeth
A fitness level that is something I've never seen before
Energy that won't quit
Getting painfree use of my feet again
Taking up yoga
Taking up dance
More added when I think of it.

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